Mix For Reaching The End…
OF YOURSELF IN NORTH CAROLINA, SEEING THE DEAD END OF YOUR MARRIAGE AND DECIDING TO TAKE THE SUBARU OFF ROAD.
1. “Have I Always Loved You,” by Copeland—
Remembering you in a green dress,
you and I laughing around a table,
our glasses still full.
2. “Beautiful You,” by The Pains of Being Pure at Heart—
I could never be you
with poison in your locket.
3. “Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now,” by The Smiths—
I was happy in the hour of my drunken haze,
smiling at people who don’t care if I die,
just needing to get out of the house.
4. “What a Good Boy,” by Barenaked Ladies—
The hairshirt I wear is woven from your brown hair,
weighed with songs I bear. Bear them with me.
5. “Lazarus,” by David Bowie—
This way or no way,
I’ll be free, just like that blue bird.
6. “Midnight: Carroll Street,” by Into It. Over It.—
I’m demanding answers from double standards,
with a fine-tooth comb, bending receivers
to hear you out, to hear you at all.
7. “End Frigate Constellation,” by The Appleseed Cast—
Face all the danger inside
like going through cancer,
decide if it’s worth the hard wait, the dark night.
8. “No Way,” by The Naked and Famous—
Can you feel daylight
with a bag of bones under your bed?
9. “Cold Creeps,” by Owl John—
Frostbitten, the length of my spine.
Look what they left me with,
invisible hurt from a silent attack.
10. “Maps for the Getaway (Canyons Version),” by Andrew McMahon—
There’s a light left on in the house
where we once lived.
11. “Jackson,” by Cymbals Eat Guitars—
I dream in the color of your face,
the California coast in your mirror shades,
my only relief.
12. “The Only Thing,” by Sufjan Stevens—
Do I care if I survive this burying of the dead?
Should I tear my eyes out before I see too much?
I can’t save you from sorrow.
13. “Unfinished,” by Mineral—
I wish I could put your ear up to my heart
so you could hear how much I love you.
14. “The World Is So Difficult to Give Up,” by David Ignatow
I’m tied to you
on a stake.
15. “Burning Your Eyes in the Sun,” by Ace Enders—
We don’t need light to see, just the reflection
of who we are within, so close your eyes.
16. “All Fuzzed Out,” by Beach Slang
17. “With All My Heart,” by Clem Snide—
In your sleep, you said
Give back what you took from me
and I wrote it down.
18. “The Trapeze Swinger,” by Iron & Wine—
Remember us at Halloween,
our faces grey and bloody—two zombies.
Christopher Menezes holds a BA in creative writing from California State University, Long Beach, and an MFA in poetry from Converse College. His work has appeared in literary publications like Switchback, RipRap, Rockvale Review, Gold Man Review, Untenured, Foliate Oak, Buck Off Magazine, and others. He works as a copy writer in southern California, where he lives with his wife and dog, and tries to surf and play music as much as possible.